The 2014 summer edition of the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog arrived in the mail the other day, just in time for Christmas (or was it too late for Christmas?) All great stuff for me — not to buy, of course, but to make fun of. For example:
Fold-away adult bunk beds: This is the perfect gift for ex-cons who simply want to create the homey and secure feeling of being in the slammer. Those living alone will be able to choose either top or bottom without resorting to using a shiv to make a convincing argument.
Instant badminton court: What better way to get rid of unwanted guests than to suddenly exclaim: How about a game of badminton? You can set up a full-size court in three minutes replete with racquets and whatever those things are you hit over the net. Invited to a party at someone else’s house? The handy carrying case allows you to ruin anyone’s get-together at the drop of a hat. Or whatever that thing is you hit over the net.