When all seemed hopeless, he tried to take his own life.
But Morgantown teen Ethan Mosbey is alive, a survivor of repeated abuse. He and 27 other central Indiana high school seniors who spent time in foster care persevered. They graduated high school and are starting the next chapters of their lives. Last month, they celebrated the milestone.
The state hosts an annual event to honor teens in foster care as they reach graduation. The 28 teens applied to participate in the program, according to an Indiana Department of Child Services news release.
The celebration brought the graduates to The Bullseye Event Center in Indianapolis, where they received special gifts, dinner among friends and family, and well-wishes from state officials, according to the news release.
When the program launched in 2016, it celebrated just five graduates. It has grown steadily each year, with this year’s class being the largest yet. Most of the graduates plan to attend college to continue their education. Others will enter the military or workforce, the news release said.
“You’ve achieved something special, and you deserve to celebrate,” said Terry Stigdon, DCS director, in a video. “People will be able to look at you and see someone who has overcome incredible obstacles and sometimes overwhelming odds.”
Two local graduates shared their stories of chaos, hope and survival.
Finding a safe haven
Mosbey, who graduated in May from Franklin Community High School, is from the small Ohio River city of Cannelton, about an hour’s drive east of Evansville. Mosbey lived in the city of about 1,500 people until he was a teenager. When his mother introduced a new man into their house, things took a turn for the worst, he said.
When someone new came into Mosbey’s home, things started to go south. He endured physical and mental abuse. Eventually, he had enough, he said.
“I tried to reach out to my caseworkers and my therapist a few times. I would tell them, ‘I’m not OK.’ My mental health was unstable and I would tell them, ‘I’m considering more permanent solutions.’”
Mosbey felt unsafe and isolated in Cannelton, he said.
“When I was 16, I did not expect to live to be 18 years old. I thought either something would happen or I would be pushed over the edge,” Mosbey said. “I was afraid some accident would happen or I would tick someone off and they would kill me. Cannelton was not exactly the most peaceful city.”
His one refuge was school, and Mosbey made a pledge to himself to graduate and avoid dropping out.
“When I went to Cannelton (High School), my home life started affecting my social life, because whenever I was upset at home, (the school) was only three miles away,” Mosbey said. “We would walk the three miles to the high school and chill out there for a few hours and when I was calmed down, I would walk back home. School and friends would help me forget what would happen at home.”
But after several months of familial abuse, he decided he wouldn’t go home from school.
“I told the principal I didn’t want to go back home because I didn’t feel safe. That was really the breaking point for me,” Mosbey said.
Shortly afterwards, he found relief in the foster care system. A relative of his was already part of the system and took him in. Mosbey ended up at Franklin Community High School, living with that relative in Morgantown.
“When I came up here, it was really like starting a new life,” he said. “I just needed to figure out who I want to be. I knew I was reaching adulthood. I need to be that light people can look at and not blind themselves.”
Mosbey is headed to the University of Southern Indiana in Evansville to study English. He hopes to teach high school and pursue a doctorate degree to teach at a university, he said.
“I have a quote I made a little while ago that helps me a lot with these little trials,” he said. “I will paint a beautiful portrait using the cinders and ashes of my past.”
Adapting to change
In a similar situation, Donnell Webster found himself in foster care due to abuse at home.
Webster, who attended the foster care graduation celebration with Mosbey, was in the foster care system for a decade, starting in 2011, when he was just eight years old.
After a “toxic” upbringing and a fight for help with his mental health issues that started at a young age, Webster found help in the foster care system.
Despite being moved away from the abusive situation at home, being in the system wasn’t easy either. Webster moved around constantly, he said.
“I would say (I was in) maybe 10 or 11 schools all over the state. I was in Gary, Merrillville, Mishawaka, Indianapolis four different times and Greenwood two different times. It was absolutely tough. It made it harder to get my education, but I did it,” Webster said.
Along with the constant moves and changes in school, he was also away from his family. There was still some mutual love between them, so that absence was difficult for Webster’s mental health.
“It was really hard,” Webster said. “I could call them and talk to them but I couldn’t see them in person. It took a toll on me. I got over it by talking to them on the phone, tablet or computer. I would Google Meet or Facetime, or use video messenger. That’s how I got through it.”
During his time in foster care, Webster came out as gay. Though he faced some backlash, he was accepted by most people who knew his sexual orientation, he said.
“My therapist, Brae Salmond, and my collaborative case manager, Deborah Otun-Yaro, helped me discover who I am,” he said. “Brae was the reason I was comfortable enough to come out, period. Deborah helped me realize it’s not all about what you have in the moment, but what you enjoy. You have to enjoy everything you have while it lasts.”
Toward the end of high school, Webster attended classes at Central Nine Career Center, a vocational school in the county. During his time there, he didn’t have a specific career goal in mind, but wanted to explore possible interests in hopes he would discover his passion. Now, he’s studying cosmetology at Empire Beauty School in Southport, he said.
“That’s really driving my career,” Webster said.
After being in four residential homes — similar to assisted living for children in foster care — three foster homes, and three or four psychiatric hospitals, he is happy to have reached adulthood, he said.
“I’ve learned a lot,” Webster said. “The biggest thing I’ve learned is you have to learn how to adapt to change. A lot of change was for the better and I could not be more grateful for it.”
