By Cherie Lowe
Paying off debt brings with it a lot of misconceptions. Many of the people I encounter think that to pay off debt you must be one of the following: crazy, miserable, or crazy miserable.
Maybe I’m exaggerating just a wee bit, but a quick internet search of images associated with the word “debt” yields a number of stock photos and cartoons. The people in each and every one of them look far from happy.
A man cradles his head in his hands. A woman looks stressed and overwhelmed. A number of graphics include cute little cartoons bearing a great burden with anxiety written all over their computer generated faces. Their eyes streaming tears and their brow drenched in sweat, they look as if they will be crushed by boulders three times their size on their shoulders. The word “DEBT” towers over them with its disgusting glare.
It’s easy to adopt the search engine attitude when it comes to getting our finances in order. The job will never be done. We’ll never have any fun. Life will be miserable when we make the choice to pay off debt. Our children will suffer and we will miss out on everything.
Can money really buy happiness?
“Money can’t buy you happiness, but it is a half-price coupon.” My husband winks at me as he quickly quips this little gem of pseudo wisdom. Most of us realize that while money can provide for our needs and make life much easier, there are plenty of people with more than enough money times two who aren’t very happy.
Yes, as the country song goes, money can buy you a boat. However, there are plenty of people who don’t have money or a boat who are incredibly happy. The sooner we realize chasing after more money or more things won’t fill the holes in our lives, the better off we are.
Convinced if we just have a little bit more then we will be happy, we spin our wheels in a never-ending crazy cycle. Spoiler: once you get just a little bit more, you’ll want a little bit more. No matter how much or how little you have, money has no power to make you happy. On the flipside, your lack of money shouldn’t be allowed the luxury to make your miserable either.
The ‘personal’ in personal finance
In the end, if we allow our emotions or the pursuit of happiness to govern our finances, we end up overspending or hoarding. Both issues usually stem from fear — fear of not getting what we want or fear of not having enough.
Personal finance is just that — very personal. It’s not an invisible force beyond your control. At some point in your life, you have to own your personal habits (both good and bad) and reign them in in order to provide for your family, prepare for your future and make a difference in the world.
Sacrifice, misery aren’t the same
Paying off debt does require sacrifice. In order to say yes to one thing, you almost always have to say no to something else. If you want to run a marathon, you have to say yes to spending time training and no to spending that same number of minutes on the couch watching Netflix. If you want to earn a degree, in order to say yes to showing up to class, studying and doing your homework, you must say no to other activities that might occupy your time.
So in order to pay off debt, you may have to say no to yourself when it comes to choices such as buying a new car or dining out several times a week or snagging that bargain on a new pair of shoes. But let’s be clear. Sacrifice and misery aren’t the same thing.
During the seasons of my life when our family has been paying off debt or saving money for a greater goal, I’ve actually found I experience more joy in the journey. In the midst of sacrifice, my heart becomes refined in what really matters. I begin to discover gratitude in things I might have taken for granted before.
Don’t get me wrong. Sacrifice can be painful. But there’s a difference between pain and misery. Pain in most cases is temporary — a stubbed toe, a broken bone, a searing cut. All can be healed over time. Misery is forever — a deep ache and longing for something more. I’m of the opinion that the something more you long for isn’t of this world, and it certainly can’t be attained through money.
Fight through the pain, debt slaying warriors. You do not have to be miserable to pay off debt. Your sacrifice has greater purpose and this season of your life — it is temporary. Find joy and even happiness in the simplest of things as you wage your war. Show your debt you will not be held prisoner by misery.
Greenwood resident Cherie Lowe and her husband paid off $127,000 in debt in four years and now live debt-free every day with their two kids. She is the author of “Slaying the Debt Dragon: How One Family Conquered Their Money Monster and Found an Inspired Happily Ever After.” Send questions, column ideas and comments to [email protected]
