GREENWOOD, IN.
Fredene Kay Daeschner died aged 82 surrounded by loved ones on the eve of Resurrection Sunday and what would have been her 62nd anniversary.
When asked a few months earlier what she wanted people to say about her when she was gone, she didn’t hesitate: “The truth!” she declared.
So here goes…
Whether you knew her as Fredene, Mom, Grammy or Gram, you’d know she was loving, kind, funny, clever, full of life, nurturing, and loyal; an incorrigible spoiler of pets and small children and an unassuming spiritual mentor to more people than she realized. At the same time, her Swedish heritage meant she could also be stubborn and more than a little feisty?not least because of the near-constant pain she endured during decades of afflictions, including a stroke, a heart attack, fibromyalgia, and cancer.
However, the far more important Truth she would want us to ponder as we celebrate her life is Jesus’ uncompromising declaration to those who know they need saving: “I am the Way, and the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6) Her favorite Bible verses included Proverbs 3:5-6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.” These eternal truths proved to be the sustaining constants of her life.
Born the day after Christmas in 1941, Fredene had to grow up quickly as the eldest child in a small farming family in McPherson, Kansas. By the age of 11, she could turn out full meals for the family and farmhands, and she also became an accomplished seamstress, sewing everything from buttons and zippers to full-fledged dresses. When she was 19, she fell in love with J. Ross Daeschner, a farmboy who dreamt of becoming a cowboy after finishing his stint in the Air Force. Within months, they were married, moving to Texas and California before J. left the military to manage ranches in Kansas and Colorado.
Having been raised a Christian and soon with two young children of her own, Fredene gradually became disillusioned with the diluted religion of mainstream churches in the 1970s. She sought something more and eventually found it: a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. And in time, it ended up being through her faith?and that of her mother?that her husband and children were later won to Christ, ensuring to this day that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren would be trained up to know the way they should go (Proverbs 22:6).
After J. nearly died in a ranching accident, the Daeschner family moved back to Kansas, where they settled down to run a successful café-restaurant centered on Fredene’s homestyle cooking. When her now-Christian ex-cowboy told her the Lord was calling him to the ministry, she initially resisted being uprooted yet again. However, she soon threw herself into helping support him and the family as they relocated to Kentucky, where J. graduated from Asbury Seminary in 1988. As if she weren’t busy enough in her new career as a minister’s wife, Fredene finally completed her own university degree at the age of 50, earning a bachelor’s in Gerontology and working with Alzheimer’s and special-needs patients until her own illness forced her to retire. Even then, Fredene continued to regale kids with her children’s sermons (“The Wonderful World of the Upside Down”) and often commented that she’d been blessed to see far more of the world than she’d ever expected growing up as a small-town girl, having traveled to various parts of the US, with jaunts to England, France and Germany.
At the beginning of the Covid pandemic in 2020, when nursing homes were going into lockdown, Fredene accompanied her soulmate on one final journey: she willingly had herself admitted to the same nursing home as J., sacrificing her freedom (and love of cooking) so that he wouldn’t be alone. They lived in adjoining rooms until J.’s death on New Year’s Day 2021.
Fredene leaves behind her children and their spouses, Julie and Rev. Jeff Buck of Greenwood, IN, Jeff and Aline Daeschner of Gilford, CT, Ngoc and Kim Chi Ly Van Nguyen of Atlanta, GA,, Kim and Darrell Hawkins of Lexington, KY, and Dmetrius Conley-Williams of Lexington, KY, as well as a sister, Aleta Kite of Oceanside, California, and a brother, Rick Lindbeck of Escondido, Calfornia, IN, and 11 grandchildren plus eight great-grandchildren (and counting), plus her nephews and many dear friends.
Although we will miss her steadfast love, advice and feistiness, we are very thankful to know that Fredene’s long years of suffering are now over and that her faith in the Resurrection has finally become sight. As one of her granddaughters put it, we also think it’s pretty cool she made it to Paradise just in time to celebrate Easter 2024 with Grandpoppy.
A celebration of life service will be conducted on Saturday, April 27, 2024, at 3:30PM at Mt. Auburn Church Stones Crossing Campus, 3100 West Stones Crossing Road in Greenwood, IN and will be live-streamed at facebook.com/mountauburnchurch.
A time of gathering will take place on Saturday, April 27, 2024, from 2:30PM until service time at the church.
Swartz Family Community Mortuary and Memorial Center, 300 South U.S. 31 (Morton Street) in Franklin, IN is handling the arrangements.
Memorial contributions may be made in memory of Fredene Daeschner to One Mission Society, 941 Fry Road, Greenwood, IN 46142 or at www.onemissionsociety.org for Daniel and Amanda Buck #802594.
Online condolences may be sent to the family at www.swartzmortuary.com. Information 317-738-0202.
